Hi ho, hi ho, off to physical therapy I go, hi ho, hi ho, hi ho…
Friday I went to physical therapy for my whiplash. This was not my first time at Terrio Therapy Fitness; I’ve spent a lot of time there for my knees. But this was my first time for my neck injury so technically I was a new patient again.

I sat next to an elderly lady and a couple other new patients waiting for ‘T’, my physical therapist. They waited too, anxiously so. They fidgeted in their chairs anticipating treatment they were unsure of. The elderly lady wrung her twisted arthritic fingers while talking to the lady sitting next to her.

“What happens next?” The elderly lady asked.

“We just wait here till they are ready for you.” The lady next to her responded.

“Skinny.” ‘T’ called out the nickname he gave me over a year ago.

I looked up to find ‘T’ standing in front of me. I got up and followed him back to the physical therapy area that was his domain.

The others watched as I left our waiting chairs behind. They were waiting before me, but I was a permanent fixture at Terrio.

The injury evaluation began with questions. Questions like: “On a scale of 1 to 10 how bad is your pain?” And “How did the injury occur?” I told ‘T’ the story of how I was rear-ended by a Sonnet.

“Were you looking in the rear view mirror?” He asked.

“No, I was watching the ducks in Truxtun Lake.” I sheepishly answered.

‘T’ laughed at my answer as he typed notes into his laptop.

“That ruined a serene moment.” He said chuckling.

One of the strength conditioning coaches that I work out with along with my trainer ‘M’ walked by and said:

“Excuse me, you look just like someone who works out here. She’s pretty nice, do you know her?” He asked teasingly.

“She’s nice huh, I don’t think I know her, but thanks for telling me about her.” I played along.

‘T’ just laughed at his staff members humor.

“Does the pain keep you from doing things, from working, putting on your makeup, lifting things, driving?” He asked.

“I’m used to pain. I just deal with it and do what I have to do.” I explained.

‘T’ typed more notes into his laptop at my response while nodding his agreement. He knew better than most the kind of pain I had become used to with my knee injury. He had inflicted quite a bit of that pain on me during the first five months after my knee surgery trying to get my knee to bend when it refused to bend.

“Does the medication help with the pain.” He asked.

“It helps some.” I replied.

“Today is the first day that my neck has felt half way decent.” I told him.

“I’m sure its because I was coming here today, isn’t that how it always goes?” I continued.

“I know how to fix your neck. Let’s take a look at how bad it is.” ‘T’ said getting out his range of motion measuring tool.

He then measured my range of motion frontward and backwards and side to side.

“Lay on the table with your head facing me.” He instructed.

I did and he prodded and pushed and dug his thumbs into my shoulder blades, shoulders, neck, and head asking if that hurt each time. Asking out of habit because he could tell by touch where my pain was.

“You have muscles spasms and tightness in your neck and down into your shoulders. More so on your left side probably because your head was turned towards the ducks when you were struck from behind.” He explained teasing me as he examined me.

“And here, this spot, this is probably causing your headaches.” He explained as he pushed on a particularly painful spot near the base of my head.

Then ‘T’ placed his hands at the base of my head and top of my neck and pulled as if he was trying to pull my head off.

“Your head doesn’t come off, that’s a good thing.” He said amused.

That was ‘T’s sense of humor for you. He possessed a wicked sense of humor that made up phrases like: “A kinder gentler physical therapy” which he usually professed while he was tearing your arm or leg off and listening to you scream.

If only the insurance adjustor could hear what ‘T’ was saying, then they’d know I wasn’t making up my whiplash. I thought as ‘T’ poked, prodded, examined and talked.

‘T’ then instructed a PT aide on the particulars of my treatment. Ultra sound, heat, exercises, and so on…

The aide performed an ultra sound on both sides of my neck.

“I’ve never done an ultra sound on such tight muscles before.” The aide exclaimed.

“‘T really pushed on you hard, your neck is all red with his hand marks especially where his thumbs were pushing into your neck.” She casually remarked while performing the ultra sound.

Next she wrapped a heat pack around my neck and placed another one across my shoulders for me to lay back on and gave me a timer before she walked away.

Ahhhh this heat is really nice. I never had heat with my knee injury. It was always freezing ice with my knee. I could lie here all day with this heat around my neck it feels so good. I thought laying back on the table to enjoy my heat wrap.

Ahhhh this glorious heat so lovely. Oh but I have to pee. I picked up the timer to see nine minutes left on the clock. Nine minutes before I can pee. Can I hold it for nine minutes? Ahhhh wonderful heat feels so good! Darn I have to pee, my bladder is so full. I love this heat! Have to pee! Soothing heat. Gotta pee. This heat feels so good on my neck. I’m gonna do the pee dance right here on this table. Heat! Pee! And so on went my thoughts back and forth between the wonderful heat on my neck and the desperate need to pee.

I finally got to go pee after the aide had instructed me on several neck stretching exercises, which I had to perform to her satisfaction.

“If you’re already done with that exercise, you’re not doing it right.” She scolded at one point.

She treated me as if I’d never been in physical therapy before. When in fact I’d spent three years in physical therapy before graduating to the post rehab/fitness program that I'm currently in. Her position gives her a sense of self importance that isn’t becoming. I thought as she doled out orders to other patients and myself. Where is ‘J’? He’s ‘T’s assistant, why isn’t he working with me. I wondered.

‘J’ did instruct me on the last two exercises and wrapped my neck in a cold gel pack.

“I’m disappointed I was expecting one of your massages.” I told ‘J’.

“All this time I’ve been coming here, every neck patient I’ve seen got a famous ‘J’ massage.” I explained to ‘J’ who was the massage therapist at Terrio.

“‘T’ worked with you today, you’ll get me and a massage on Monday.” He explained.

I left physical therapy feeling like a Condors bobblehead. My neck had been stretched every which way. I will say this though, neck physical therapy is way better than knee physical therapy. Of course it could just be that my neck is no where near as bad off as my knee was after surgery. In fact I know that is the case.  posted by Matildakay at 11:33 PM