Photo by: N.L. Belardes
One Bakersfield Woman's Blog to Mankind
Thursday, September 14, 2006
Breaking Tradition, the Mother of the Bride
Who should have the honor of walking the bride down the aisle? The father who abandoned his wife and children and didn’t help provide for his children? Or the mother who has given all of herself, her money, her time, her labor, and her love to raise two of the most beautiful and sweet young women you will ever meet? Sunday evening my girlfriend ‘D’ broke tradition and walked her daughter down the aisle.
Sixteen years ago ‘D’ walked into my Cosmetic store crying from divorce court. I did a makeover on her, made her feel beautiful and we’ve been friends ever since. She’s one of those strong women I was talking about in Burn the Witch. I’ve watched her struggle over the years. Struggle to have gas money while making sure her daughters had everything they needed. I've watched her work 6 days a week because her ex husband wouldn’t pay child support. I’ve been there when she had her heart broken. When her daughters had their hearts broken. And when my ex husband left me... she was there for me.
So when she called me and told me that her oldest daughter was getting married and that they wanted me to do the makeup for the wedding just like I had done for every other important event in their lives, I was thrilled. It had been a few years since I had done makeup for a wedding, but it felt like I had never quit. Mother of the bride, grandmother of the bride, sister of the bride and the bride herself… I did four women’s makeup in two hours.
And then I watched as my dear friend had the honor she deserved for being the one that was there in her daughter’s life... giving the bride away. She was never more proud than in that moment…
Next August she gets to do it all over again... she'll walk her younger daughter down the aisle.
Who should have the honor of walking the bride down the aisle? The father who abandoned his wife and children and didn’t help provide for his children? Or the mother who has given all of herself, her money, her time, her labor, and her love to raise two of the most beautiful and sweet young women you will ever meet? Sunday evening my girlfriend ‘D’ broke tradition and walked her daughter down the aisle.
Sixteen years ago ‘D’ walked into my Cosmetic store crying from divorce court. I did a makeover on her, made her feel beautiful and we’ve been friends ever since. She’s one of those strong women I was talking about in Burn the Witch. I’ve watched her struggle over the years. Struggle to have gas money while making sure her daughters had everything they needed. I've watched her work 6 days a week because her ex husband wouldn’t pay child support. I’ve been there when she had her heart broken. When her daughters had their hearts broken. And when my ex husband left me... she was there for me.
So when she called me and told me that her oldest daughter was getting married and that they wanted me to do the makeup for the wedding just like I had done for every other important event in their lives, I was thrilled. It had been a few years since I had done makeup for a wedding, but it felt like I had never quit. Mother of the bride, grandmother of the bride, sister of the bride and the bride herself… I did four women’s makeup in two hours.
And then I watched as my dear friend had the honor she deserved for being the one that was there in her daughter’s life... giving the bride away. She was never more proud than in that moment…
Next August she gets to do it all over again... she'll walk her younger daughter down the aisle.
That's awesome! And you were a part of their special day!
My sister in law had her dad, and stepdad walk her down the aisle. How can you choose between the two men that mean the most to you?
To hell with tradition. It's your special day. You do what feels right to YOU!
Hooray for "D!" I say, right on.
Traditions are meant to be broken.
That's a wonderful story! Who would take exception to a mother walking their daughter down the aisle? -- Greg Goodsell
I love this!
When I was a child in Glen Ridge, NJ, it was extremely rare for my friend's parents to be divorced. My friends, Bernadette and Marguerite, were two of the rare ones in that situation... AND they were devout Catholics... which made it a huge stigma, too. Their Mom was the only working Mom I knew... all the kids in our town went home for lunch in elementary school and Bernadette and Marguerite came home every day with me for lunch.
Their mother did the honors when they got married. Both daughters have really healthy, vital marriages with incredible children.... all a testimony, I think, to their wondrous mother.
I am remembering what a tiny little woman she was, too. :-)
I needed that smile today - THANK YOU!
Can I be one of her daughters?
Beautiful.
D is awesome.